Thank you Dad. I want my whole life to be a thank you letter to you. You could have stopped. You could have just saved me. You could have just given me the opportunity to be saved. This alone would have been worth more than I will ever have to give. Yet you continue to save me. Ever. Single. Day. You continue to listen. You continue to pursue my heart, relentlessly. You continue to relentlessly pursue my friends, my family, even my friend’s families. Your love just does not quit.
What am I supposed to do with that kind of love? Who am I to withhold ANYTHING from a love that strong? Who am I to withhold my body, my money, my family, my children? You are worthy of EVERYTHING most precious to me. And if it is of any real value, it is more precious to you than it ever could be to me. Even those I love the most, are worth more to you than I could ever imagine, the same goes for those I love the least. “Freely you have received, freely give,” does not just apply to our money, or our things, or our time. It applies to EVERYTHING we are and EVERYTHING we have.
Jesus withheld nothing. He poured Himself out completely, knowing, many would refuse His give, abuse His gift, continue to inflict pain on themselves and others, while hurting Himself in the process. Yet He chose to give it all. So, as a son, to a Father like that, what am I supposed to do? What are we supposed to do? I believe the answer is to give it all. Every shred of dignity, every tear, every ounce of love, every hard goodbye, every failure, every potential letdown, every single preference, and every single thing we hold dear. Nothing of true value can be taken or shaken. There’s freedom in this truth. There’s freedom in Him. There will never be more to gain than in giving it all. How can I not?
I’ve been thinking lately about the depths of God’s love, mercy, and forgiveness. I think about how difficult it would be, how much love and mercy it would require, to truly forgive your wife for giving her deepest and most intimate affections to someone else. A wife you have perpetually lavished with all your love. To not only forgive her, but also withhold none of your love from her after her adultery.
To truly forgive a wife in this way, even a wife begging for forgiveness on her knees after one isolated incidence of unfaithfulness, would be tremendously difficult in itself. What about forgiving a wife who has been unfaithful more times than can be counted, every day even? What about forgiving a wife in the middle of her adultery, knowing she is going to do it again?
This would require a love, a mercy, a compassion completely beyond what any human is capable of. A love whose depth I will never be able to grasp. Despite all odds, this love exists. This love is real. This love is after all of us, actively. This love is a person. This love is Jesus. This love wants to be my friend, my groom, my forever. Despite all I have done. Despite all I am going to do. This love changed my life, and is still changing it even as I write this. This love saves those most would not even waste a prayer on. This love is worth dying for, and more importantly, this love is worth living for, every second. Thank you God.
[Update: Home is coming in hot, less than a month away. This simple fact is crazy to wrap our minds around. We’re finishing out this season in Thailand, it’s been incredible and challenging and the Lord is on the move. Grateful for this beautiful place and these beautiful people. Grateful to be a light amidst so much darkness, so much evil. Please pray all of us would keep our eyes fixed on Him, finishing this chapter of our lifelong race stronger even than when we started. Pray for hope for all of these people. Pray no matter what, they will see a way out, in Jesus. Pray God would prepare our hearts and the hearts around us for all that’s to come, in this season and the next. Pray for gratefulness for the hard goodbyes. Pray for protection over our minds, hearts, and bodies. Pray for the captives to be set free.]
